I’ve realized a few things this past week:
1. I miss my best friend so much it hurts. I wish things turned out differently. I don’t know how to make them better when there are so many obstacles in the way.
2. No matter how tough I pretend to be, I can get my heart broken just as easily as the next girl. I have a tendency to get attached to the guy I’m with, to make him the center of my world, and that’s where I go wrong, because when he hurts me, it really hurts, and I end up feeling like I am dying. I need to stop that.
3. I need to get serious, and stay serious, about my education. It’s important, and one little mistake can screw it all up, and I’m done putting people (*ahem* guys *ahem*) before my education. Guys are there for a moment, and are never a guarantee, whereas your education is paving the way to your future. I need to remind myself of that.
4. I also need to get serious, and stay serious, about my writing. I love writing, I want it as a career in some way or another, so I need to work at it every day, and if that means forcing myself to write some days, so be it. I didn’t work this hard for nothing.
5. My relationship with my mom is currently being repaired, and I’m happy about it. The boyfriend I had was wonderful for the moment, but when it came down to it, he was only there when he wanted to be there. My mom is there always, whether she really wants to be or not, and I put our relationship in jeopardy for five and a half months for this guy, who hurt me, constantly. It was never an intentional hurt, but he has a lot of growing up to do.
6. I need to get back to doing things that I love, like reading books, shopping, and hanging out with friends, because though I’m busy, I need to make time for fun too.
Anyway, I downloaded some songs last night to my iPod and computer. :D I’m very picky, so it wasn’t much:
1. “Airplanes” by B.o.B. feat. Hayley Williams and Eminem
2. “California Gurls” by Katy Perry feat. Snoop Dog
3. “Not Afraid” by Eminem
4. “Break Your Heart” (remix) by Taio Cruz feat. Ludacris
5. “Ridin’ Solo by Jason Derulo
6. “Nothing On You” by B.o.B. feat. Bruno
7. “I Made It” by Kevin Rudolf
8. “Haven’t Met You Yet” by Michael Buble
9. “Rude Boy” by Rihanna
10. “I Never Told You” by Colbie Caillat
11. “Drop The World” by Lil Wayne
12. “I’m Awesome” by Spose
13. “Ur So Gay” by Katy Perry
14. “Waking Up In Vegas” by Katy Perry
15. “Thinking Of You” by Katy Perry
16. “Our Song” by The Spill Canvas
17. “Adorable” by Artist vs. Poet
18. “Miserably Loving You” by Artist vs. Poet
19. “That’s What She Said” by The Friday Night Boys
20. “Stupid Love Letter” by The Friday Night Boys
21. “Stuttering” by The Friday Night Boys
22. “High School” by The Friday Night Boys
23. “Suicide Sunday” by The Friday Night Boys
